Tick Tock

Hi all,
Today I did practically everything - except study. If this shocks you, it shouldn't. I fully realize I have my last final tomorrow and that I shouldn't be lulled into a false sense of security by the fact that it's in English. However, I made every class this semester, excepting one about 2 months ago that won't have material we're coving on the final anyways. Since all this Professor did was talk and talk and talk, if I haven't gotten the information down by now - no amount of studying this week would have made up for it. Add this to the fact that time seems to be trickling by until I get home, the importance of spending my last days here in a memorable manner far outweigh the potential consequences of my grade slipping a little in one course.

Today I packed one of my suitcases. My middle sized one is staring at me in an accusing manner, as it is 2/3rds full of books and the rest of my life is still strewn about the room. However, the washing machine (which apparently got replaced today...better late than never?) has wrecked havoc on my t-shirts, and so many of them won't be coming home with me. I'm also tempted to leave my slip-on Merrels behind...those poor shoes have been with me for years beyond common sense - even I wince when I take them off and see the state of the edges and bottom. But it almost seems disloyal, I mean, those shoes have taken me places. What's more, they don't make that design anymore (see, a recurring theme in my life...which unfortunately is the basis of the fashion industry). Likewise, leaving behind perfectly good books seems also as hard. I know I can leave some with Claudia and Christine, Eric's promised to bring them over whenever he goes back and forth, and honestly, it's probably not too terribly late to ship them. However, since books are my drug of choice and a good path to escapism, I feel we need to stick together. I also fully realize how very silly that sounds, and doubtlessly will relinquish my death grip on too-simple German exercise books. But these things take time.

In between sleeping today (levels of stress and anxiety have thrown my sleep schedule off-kilter, and I was up around 7:30 for no reason today) , I found the time to Get Things Done - such as closing my bank account today. I would thought it'd be harder to go through the steps necessary for me to come home; however, they actually are comforting as they give me targets for things to do and don't let me sit around in indecision or doing nothing. Which I still do, and enjoy immensely. Honestly, the period in my life where I will be allowed that kind of lazy freedom will be limited. My last year of college and then whatever ever happens afterwards are most likely Not going to allow me an afternoon nap, or a random stroll around the city. But at least now I'll have the memories of it.

It strikes me as ironic, that just as I'm finally being able to not only tolerate but actually appreciate some beers that I will be going to a country scorned in the beer industry. However, as I cultivated (ha) my wine taste this year, I look forward to being able to have a glass with dinner occasionally. After the marvel that is "Kaufland"'s wine selection, nothing can daunt me. Plus, being a student, I'm certainly used to cheap wine and will be unable to set myself up to be disappointed. Well, as this is starting to make me sound like a bit of an alcoholic (laughable, as I've had perhaps 5 drinks in a months time - and no, not just counting July) - onward!

As long as I'm being honest, I can fully admit that my room is about a 6.8 on the scale of room catastrophe. Things were shifted to be packed, loads of laundry had been lying around to be washed when appropriate load-size was reached and notes lay scattered from half or full-hearted studying attempts and succession. However, as Mom always said (whenever she could con/bribe/overtly threaten (and there wasn't much bribing, let me tell you) me into cleaning my room "It always looks worse before it gets better". And it'll get clean - practically spotless, as it has to be. And then I'll take a picture, just to have a pre-during-post sequence. (Although I cheated on the during and tidied some).

At any rate, I'm sure your mind is boggling from this non-headed post, so take your time to recuperate, and have a piece of cheddar cheese for me. (Because when I get home, there will be a scarcity in my near proximity...I have 11 months to make up for!).

Hope all is well,
Steph