Thursday, March 4, 2010

In A Completely Non-Bisexual Way...

Hi all,

I really enjoy my housemother, but sometimes she can really catch me by surprise. She told me she can micro-manage, so all I have to do (like when she was going to do my dishes when I stepped away for 1 minute to stir my saute) is say "housemom..." and lift my eyebrows and she usually gets it. She's a compulsive straightener, so I know she's trying.

Anyhow, today we had to drop off the van at the repair shop to get the oil changed. I met her there in a borrowed car (haven't decided if I'm smitten or only intrigued with the Priuses). As I was driving her back, she hesitantly asked if she could ask me something, on a completely un-job related topic. (She was also afraid it might be illegal...and assured me that I didn't have to answer...).

"Sure, go for it."
(You know, shy me.)
"Well, are you....are you bisexual?"
(Totally not what I was expecting...vague village rumors of who I might be interested/interested in me, perhaps, but this was out of left field!)
"Um, well, no. I do believe that sexuality is a fluid concept and I fully support those who have different views on it, but I've never been sexually attracted to a woman before, so I'm pretty sure I'm 100% straight...."
"Oh! Ok. I was just going to say, that we're so supportive here - and I just wanted to let you know that I would support you, if you were."


(Because, really, what do you say to that??)

"Um, why do you ask, out of curiousity?"
"Oh, just some things you've said."
(Like WHAT???? I really hope this isn't about that swimsuit edition that lived under my bed lately...maybe something from science fiction?? I'm at a complete loss, and she couldn't name anything in particular.)

So that was a fun car ride home.

Honestly though, it's nice to know that she would be supportive of me no matter what my orientation is, but I can't help but to tease her a bit about it now. Also, I might've (in a bit of a fit of reciprocity shock-factor) informed her what a MILF is. That was funny.

Anyhow, as I told her I'm going to go and hang out with Bean, I helpfully clarified for her:
"In a completely non-bisexual way, of course."

I can be so helpful.

Hope all is well,

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